My train journey from Pokhara to Kathmandu

All passengers are warmly welcome to KP Railway Station, Pokhara

My train journey from Pokhara to Kathmandu

By LB Thapa

I have long been an ardent admirer of KP Oli, and I remain so to this day. There are many distinctive qualities in his personality that set him apart and make him a compelling figure of public interest. His life has been so eventful and adventurous that no single book could adequately capture it; it would require several volumes to do justice to his journey. 

Telling the truth, I see an impression of Rajesh Khanna, the first Bollywood superstar, in KP Ba’s personality. There was a time when Indian youths would go crazy for Rajesh Khanna. Catching a glimpse of Rajesh Khanna would be like a dream come true for many youths. It is said that no Bollywood star could ever attain that stardom. 

Our KP Ba is also the Rajesh Khanna of Nepali politics. KP Ba did achieve the same stardom that Rajesh Khanna once had attained. And the charm of his stardom is still on. Although Rajesh Khanna is no more, our great KP Ba is still batting in his 80s, and now he eyes a century. 

He changed kidneys, so what! No matter what other parts of his body are necessary to be changed, he will change, but he will fight the election till the end. The loud resonance of Ghanti cannot scare him. That’s why he is fighting from Jhapa-5, his bastion. He is more like a Dumsi, living under his burrow. If Balen Shah and his company think to smoke him out of his burrow and later chase him out of Jhapa. This is not going to happen because KP Ba’s skin is not only thick but at the same time it is too rough as well. 

If he truly wishes to compete with the new generation, perhaps he needs a few mechanical upgrades. His heart and lungs are already made of steel—there is no need to replace them. But installing a sturdy steel rod in his legs and stainless-steel kneecaps might do the trick. With such enhancements, he would be fully equipped for the Gen Z era. Outwardly, he may still appear old, but inwardly he would be a brand-new, next-generation model. 

The other day I had a dream that I would like to share with you. I stood at KP Oli Railway Station Pokhara, on platform number 5, where I was eagerly waiting to board my train. The train was on time. It was on the Oli Superfast Train. I sat on a comfortable chair, fully air-conditioned. A big screen was on top of our heads where Comrade Prachanda was giving the speech. “You see, I promised you to make Nepal like Singapore. Today I have made Nepal not like Singapore but better than Singapore. In the meantime, I am grateful to my seasonal friend Mr. Oli, who did also keep his promise of starting a superfast train in Nepal. You should thank KP Oli for introducing a superfast train starting from Kathmandu-Pokhara-Kushma and Baglung." 

I reached Kathmandu at KP Oli Railway Station. I was so surprised to see a fully automated and highly digitalized railway station in Kathmandu. The railway station in Pokhara was also not bad, but in Kathmandu it was superb. I was walking around the busy street of Kathmandu. But I was taken aback at seeing a statue of KP Ba. 

The place where KP Ba’s statue stood is the same place where the statue of Prithvi Narayan Shah once stood. The statue of KP Ba instantly drew my attention. Because, in the statue, he held one hen in one of his hands and two eggs in his other hand. I was completely bamboozled at seeing a statue of KP Ba with a hen and two eggs in his hands. In the meantime, I saw one boy who looked like Balen Shah cleaning the street. I asked him to explain the enigma of a hen and two eggs in KP Ba’s hands. The boy called me near, and when I reached closer to him, he slapped me hard and said, “Batase anda," and I woke up from my dream. 

I think KP Ba needs more time to fulfill his dreams. Nepali people brought him to power with a full majority. He also held the premiership of the country in coalition. But this is not enough. Until now he did it for himself, for his party, and for his jholes and hanumans. Now his responsibility for jhole-mole is over. Now he is in a situation to work for the country. If he wins the present election, I am sure all Nepali people will experience LPG pipelines at their doorsteps. No shortages of LPG. Just turn on the knob, and an abundance of gas will be available for cooking. 

I was astonished by the extraordinary performance of KP Sharma Oli during the so-called Gen Z protest. Watching his daring feat, I almost forgot the high-octane stunts of Akshay Kumar. There he was, suspended by a rope and hoisted toward a helicopter, gripping the cage firmly even as it swayed dangerously back and forth. Yet our KP Ba showed no trace of fear. 

It is said that he even wished to airlift his seasonal friend, Sher Bahadur Deuba, but by then it was too late. The unruly protestors had already caught Deuba ji and his minister wife, Arzu Rana Deuba. What followed resembled a heated Lok Dohori exchange, and by the end of it, the husband and wife were left looking almost beyond recognition. 

In any case, I also support and respect Sher Bahadur Deuba ji. “Sher” means tiger—and he remains a true tiger of the Nepali Congress. As the famous Bollywood line goes, “Tiger abhi zinda hai.” 

So what if Gagan Thapa seems to have taken hold of the tree? The branches and the roots still, in many ways, belong to Shere Ba. And please, do not rush to blame him for those alleged bundles of notes hidden away in secret chambers. Let me whisper a little secret: the burnt rupees were not real at all—they were AI-generated currency. Real money, after all, is always kept in a real place—hi, hi, hi.

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